I was almost reaching meditation levels while waiting my turn for the visa officer to call me at the quiet UK Visa Centre, when I was rudely woken up by a monstrous cacophony that was coming out of what seemed like a 6 year old boy!
My first reaction was that of dismissing the sight as yet another spoilt Delhi kid (quite a few of those around as you would know), when it suddenly happened… it suddenly struck me that this could be MY Delhi kid 5 years from now!
This thought sent me into a freeze worse than a fractured hip, and the pain of such a possibility was quite close to a fracture as well.
I was almost getting a seizure, when my good brain came alive and pointed out to me that the way my son grows up to be is entirely dependant on me as a parent - how I raise him, how I can discipline him, how I can teach him the value of respecting others’ time and space, knowing when to say no to his demands, making him realize his boundaries, and basically not being a pain in the ass.
But even before I could find some peace in this thought, I saw the hapless mother who was trying desperately to leash this 6 year old devil, I saw her face which looked like a black & white movie… I saw her half-open eyes which had ‘defeated’ written large on them… and I saw her posture which would make the Hunchback of Notre dame change his name…. I saw in her a parent 5 years ago, who would have had the same grand notions of parenting, disciplining and raising a good child as I do now…
This realization came fast and cold… sending shivers down my spine… I was back in the freeze.
The Mortal Fear of Parenting had hit me…. and it seems like it’s here to stay…
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2 comments:
Hi Neo,
I think I can confidently assure you that you are not alone in this battle ! Your fears are completely valid - and you are right that a child is what its parents mould it into. As my Dad says "there is no such thing as problem children - only problem parents" ! So yes, as parents we have to do everything in our power to ensure that our kid is given the right balance of indulgence and restraint. It is a tight-rope walk with no accolades if you make it to the end but tons of self-satisfaction and pride.
Ah! Right you are, rt. And fully agree. However, the crucial phrase in what you've written is 'IF you make it to the end' ;)
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